When I woke up, I had an awareness that I needed to create some new beliefs around dairy.
Over the years, I have released a significant amount of stress connected to dairy from my body. By stress, I mean the inflammation, irritation and physical feedback I experienced after consuming it - particularly cheese because I enjoyed eating it so much.
I have not regularly drunk milk since I was 13. There may have been the occasional splash in a cup of tea during the early 2010s, back when workplace kitchens were less likely to offer soy milk or other alternatives, but milk has not otherwise been part of my diet.
Yet on this morning, as I woke, the word dairy came strongly into my awareness.
I recognised that I was still holding a very definite belief:
Dairy is not good for me.
That surprised me.
Whether I choose to eat dairy or not was not really the point. The awareness was showing me that my body was still holding stress around the idea of dairy, and that the belief itself needed to shift.
So I processed and integrated three new beliefs:
My body loves dairy.
My body processes dairy easily and comfortably.
Dairy is good for me.
Immediately after integrating those beliefs, another awareness surfaced.
When I was 13, after several months of severe discomfort, bloating, diarrhoea and blood in my stools, I spent over a week in hospital.
For part of that time, I was isolated because the doctors did not know what was wrong with me and whether I might be contagious.
Eventually, I was given the diagnosis - chronic ulcerative colitis.
One of the consultants suggested that the illness may have been triggered by a reaction to cheese. This assumption appeared to be based on the timing of my symptoms, which began after an end-of-year Pizza Hut lunch with my school friends at the end of my first year of high school.
That experience created a strong connection in my mind:
Pizza. Cheese. Dairy. Illness.
That was when I stopped drinking milk, although I continued eating cheese for some time!
What I found fascinating this morning was that I had not consciously revisited this story for many years.
My body has felt healthy. Blood tests that once monitored inflammation stopped showing the same inflammatory markers. I no longer felt attached to the diagnosis or identified myself as someone who had ulcerative colitis.
I could speak about the diagnosis I had received, but I no longer owned it as part of my identity.
Instead, I understood that my colon had once been in a state of discomfort, unhappiness and imbalance; and that it had since moved into a much healthier state.
My colon was happy and healthy.
I thought the story had ended.
The awareness that came through was that there was still stress, fear and imbalance connected to the words ulcerative colitis.
I found that fascinating, particularly given how much work I had already done around my health, bowel and large intestine.
But I stayed with the awareness.
I have learned that when an awareness arrives clearly, it is important to listen. It may be a message inviting us to pause, process, clear something or simply observe what is ready to be seen.
I began a clearing process to transmute, destroy and uncreate any remaining resonance in my body connected to ulcerative colitis.
Before beginning, I set clear intentions around what I wanted to release and what I wanted to bring in.
I chose my five foundational states:
Peace.
Non-attachment.
Wisdom.
Love.
Grace.
I then added:
Ease.
Comfort.
Strength.
Health.
Optimal health.
The final word that came through was:
Happy.
It was not merely the idea of being happy. It was a feeling of happiness at a cellular level; happiness within my body and happiness within my gut.
Because who doesn’t love a happy gut?
As I moved through the integration process, memories and visual impressions began to surface.
I saw the pizza.
I remembered receiving the diagnosis.
I recognised the story that had been formed around dairy, cheese and illness, and how that story had remained stored somewhere within my system, even after the physical symptoms and conscious attachment had changed.
I also noticed subtle physical shifts.
My abdomen relaxed.
It seemed to draw in slightly, almost as though it lengthened, toned and strengthened.
I became aware that I sometimes hold a sense of protectiveness around my abdomen through the way I stand and carry my body. During the clearing, that protectiveness softened.
My body appeared to let go.
All of this happened because I chose to take an initial awareness seriously and follow it a little deeper.
Amazing things can happen when we sit with the awarenesses we receive.
Sometimes the shift is deep and transformational. At other times, it is quiet and subtle.
An awareness may arrive as a messenger asking us to pause. It may be inviting us to process something, release something or simply become conscious of what has been sitting beneath the surface.
The important part is learning to respond in the way our whole system requires.
When we listen to the quieter messages, we may no longer need the body, mind or emotions to communicate the same message more loudly.
Hugs, love and magic!
Bhavna xx
